How To Change Your Life in 2019 And Stop Being Depressed
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HAPPY NEW YEAR! It’s 2019 y’all!
I’m really excited to see what this year brings, because 2018 was by far the best year of my life! I want to share with you, how incredibly easy it is to experience a year like I had.
Here’s a list of a few things I've accomplished in 2018:
• I found a new job that I love.
• I met tons of new people from all over the world, and made some new lifelong friends.
• I traveled to two different countries.
• I lived completely on my own for the first time ever.
• I learned to play the piano, read sheet music, and scuba dive.
• I learned how to communicate efficiently and effectively with others to drive meaningful conversations.
• Overall, I learned how to enjoy life instead of living in depression, hate, and negativity.
The most important change that has occurred in my very recent life, is that I decided to stop living in depression. Yes, I believe that is a choice you CAN make, and I MADE it! I spent my entire life wasting the time, years, and experiences I had by always dwelling on the negatives about life. It’s amazing to me to look back on that outlook on life and realize that a simple switch in my mindset was the ONLY thing holding me back from experiencing life how I see it now.
I didn’t stumble into some large sum of money. I didn’t run across some “luck streak” that allowed me to have a bunch of great things happen to me. No outside forces were really a factor to this new outlook. It was merely a mindset change. So how did I do this?
Well, let’s look at a few facts about 2018 first; facts only, no opinions about these facts:
• I started a new job on January 1, 2018. It’s a lot less stressful than all the other film related jobs I’ve had in the past. The pay is pretty low compared to industry standard for this field. It’s not a very challenging job.
• I finalized a divorced in February 2018 after being separated for 6 months (required Louisiana State Law).
• For the first time in my life, I lived completely on my own with no roommates, spouse, or parents to help with bills or rent.
• Because of outside factors, I traveled to two different countries alone.
• Starting the year off single, I began dating for the first time in about eight years.
These are some of the facts about my life in 2018. Just reading them back, I can look at each as either a positive or negative. It’s really just your mindset of how you see it.
Let’s start with my new job. The pay is substantially less than what I am used to as this is my third job in the industry as an editor and videographer. Right off the bat, negative, right? Well, not exactly. Although the pay is less, I have a ton of freedom there to be creative; time off is granted as requested; and I have fun and relax at work. I actually enjoy going into work every day. I couldn’t say any of this for my previous two jobs in the industry.
The freedom to create almost anything I want, with little to no pushback on my ideas, is fantastic! Imagine a job where each morning you are required to write a brand-new book from scratch. You spend all day writing it; then right when you’re about to leave to go home, your boss comes in your office and says, “This book sucks! Rewrite it!” You are forced to stay at work until 10 o’clock at night or later (not getting any overtime, because you are a salaried employee) transcribing word for word, a new book that your boss dictates to you instead. This is an analogy, of course, but highly relatable to my first job in the industry. You can see why more creative freedom and time off are a higher priority for me than pay.
Next, the job is not very challenging. To some, that by itself might be a positive, but I WANT to be challenged. I am always looking to grow and learn new things in life, particularly in my field. Why settle to be good or okay at what you do, when you can be great? Would you hire a doctor who decided “Meh, I’m good enough”? Probably not if you knew that was his mentality about his career. For me, I don’t let the fact that my job isn’t very challenging be the reason why I’m not challenged. For most projects, I come up with some effect or look I want to pull off that requires me to research and learn more things in order to create it.
Speaking of being challenged, this year I was challenged with one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to face. My divorce from my ex-wife was finalized in the beginning of the year. Through that, I lost one of my best friends, a dog that I absolutely loved, a lot of great friends, and my financial stability. One day I woke up and it was solely my responsibility to pay 100% of the rent, pay 100% of the bills, and do it completely alone. I didn’t look at this negatively. I knew that in order to get where I wanted to be in life, I had to push through this. I focused on landing a job and a new place to live, so I could afford the addition of other bills. I also knew I was going to be alone, so I embraced that feeling.
Being alone doesn’t mean that you are lonely. I think that is a common misconception that is feared by people who have never really been alone. I was so scared of being alone, but I decided to make the best of it. I focused the energy of loving someone else and trying make someone else happy, on myself and self-growth. I had always heard people say, “If you don’t love yourself, why would anyone else want to?” I really took that to heart. I knew how much I hated myself and my life, and I WANTED that to change.
Over a couple of months, I focused on learning things I always wanted to learn, but made excuses about why I couldn’t. I read a ton of information in books and online. I watched YouTube videos on topics, I never cared about before. In that time, I had learned the basics of reading sheet music; the basics of playing the piano; I picked up skateboarding again; I found a new love for scuba diving; and I traveled to two other countries by myself! That is something I would have NEVER considered doing. Being alone, I was forced to introduce myself and interact with strangers. Through that, I WANTED to know about these new people, I wanted to hear their stories about their journeys and experiences. I wanted to know what else is out there that I had been missing out on all this time. I started to grow as a human being exponentially! I was learning so much about myself and the world. I learned so much about the psychology of interacting with people. I grew so much confidence within myself.
So much self-development evolved within me, I became a completely new person... A reborn person! I sincerely believe that my life didn’t even start until this year past year! That is how much I believe in spending time on yourself. Push yourself outside of your comfort zone. Fully immerse yourself in a craft or hobby that you’ve been holding back from learning and making excuses why you don’t have time to learn it. Travel somewhere you think you may have no interest in. I ended up in the countryside of Canada and it was incredible! There was so much history and architecture to be experienced there. My entire attitude toward life and situations is always positive now, and that positivity shows to people. Every day people compliment me on how pleasant it is to talk to me or hang out with me, when in the past my life was FILLED with negativity. Curse words came flowing out of my mouth nearly every other word. Instead now, I’ve learned how to be a gentleman, but still express that goofy energy people actually liked about me in the past.
What started off set to be the worse year of my life, turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me. I believe that was due to simply changing my mindset to accept that the situation was a good thing, instead of dwelling on the negatives about it. Maybe this blog sounds like I have been bragging about how great my life is now, but that is not my intention. I just want you to see that merely finding the positive in any situation will change your life! I did for me.